Sunday, November 6, 2011

Missive 33 The Move!! ~ From hovel to habitable in 45 days!


5th November 2011

(just, as it’s ten past midnight!!, and a Happy Anniversary to my Mum and Dad!)
Dear All

Attached is an absolutely bumper Missive 33, don’t be put off by the size, as in terms of words it’s about average, but there are lots of pictures, as I’ve been promising for some time!!

Because of all the pictures the file is too long to attach as a word document to this email, so I have done it as a pdf file, and will therefore need opening as such.  Be patient, as it might take a while, a but let me know if for any reason you can’t open it and I’ll try to think of something else.

Failing that you could always try viewing it on the blog, where it should appear in due course, although last time when I had photos included, it took me a while to work out how to get it to load. 

Fingers crossed!

Love

 Roger

 rogerhiggs@hotmail.co.uk

Mes chers amis

The Move! ~ From hovel to habitable in 45 days!! ~ Missive 33

Byrd Baggett

Chinese Proverb

“A goodbye isn't painful unless you're never going to say hello again.”
Author Unknown


“Every goodbye is the birth of a memory.”
Dutch Proverb

Four quotes this time, and maybe I should explain!   The first two seemed apt in regard to moving on and looking forward, particularly in view of mammoth undertaking that we have taken on!  Isn’t it strange, we used to read all those books about people who had “escaped and followed their dreams” and whilst at times feeling quite envious, we couldn’t help but feel that they were rather mad – little did we know that one day we would be following them up the mountain!  But it’s already worth it for the view!

The other two quotes were from a selection I sent to Monsieur from the chateau, once we had found the house and were shortly to move on.  I wanted to tell him personally, as last summer a true friendship had blossomed and although he knew our long term intentions, it seemed polite and “aristocratic” to be up front and not simply fade away into the night like a rogue, vagabond or scoundrel – you may remember Monsieur’s love of words and classification of people into “Aristocrats or rogues et al!” – fortunately, Linda and I were elevated to the ranks of the aristocracy!  That said, we have a wealth of memories of a very happy two years plus, spent in the little house at the end of the drive, and as M. said in his reply to my email: “First of all, I congratulate you to stay in Saint Laurent de la Salle for ever! I shall have, in that case, the pleasure to see you ...for ever! If you had chosen a house in the moon, the song would
have been different!” (sic), so we’ll be saying hello again!

As for France Telecom, I ranted and raved enough last time!  But, just a quickie to update you!  As you have no doubt picked up we are now on-line and fully functioning with a new telephone number (up above if you missed the update!).  Then a few days ago I got a letter from France Telecom and as I carried it into the house I had high expectations that it might be a grovelling apology for on-going and long-term incompetency, but, surprise surprise it was a bill for said incompetency – they wanted to charge us about 170 for a technician who came out to put THEIR mistake right and who said there would be no charge!  Another phone call from Linda, who was told that she should pay it and they would reimburse it over the next three or four bills, and she told them, much to their amazement, that she was only paying those parts of the bill that we did owe and that was that!!  I hesitate to say it, but hopefully that won’t result in us being cut off  – aaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!  I do hope there won’t be anything to report next time!!

Winding Down! ~ Chapter 4

This has ended up as a very incongruous title for this chapter and this part of the story, as how I could have imagined for one minute that leaving a job such as mine at any time, let alone at Christmas, could allow any degree of “winding down” now quite eludes me!!  I guess in an ideal world, I would have given in my notice, and spent the next few months with my office door shut, tying up loose ends, before a sedate period of handing over the reins to my successor, over a few weeks where we either overlapped or at the very least had a good few days to go through all the things that being a Headteacher involves!  But even writing this now nearly three years down the line, elicits the response of “Get Real!” it just doesn’t happen like that in a busy and cash strapped environment of a primary school, where the “product” being turned out are 200 odd children all with a variety of complex needs, “manufactured” by a dedicated team of teachers and support staff, who also have their own variety of needs, of differing levels of complexity and although the production line wouldn’t instantly grind to a halt were the “MD” to shut his office door and ignore what was going on outside, I like to think that I had my uses!!  What I’m really trying to say is that, despite the attempt by various “powers that be” to inflict business / manufacturing practices onto schools, they don’t as a rule fit very easily into an ever changing, vibrant environment, where from one day to the next the “product” keeps changing and never ceases to amaze you with what they do, be it good or bad!!  You arrive each day on the “factory floor” not knowing what will have happened and where you might end up as the day finishes, however carefully planned you are!


Shutting the door and winding down, just wasn’t an option, as not only were there the day to day activities to carry out, be they mundane things like; playground duty, dinner duty, staff meetings, parents’ evenings, meetings with outside agencies, the list is endless, or the unexpected like; a blocked toilet (yes, without a full time caretaker such things often fall to the Headteacher), an upset child or one having a bad day, a member of staff taken ill or with a family crisis – again a never-ending list, and as I’ve said many a time never a dull day, but also Christmas doesn’t go by unnoticed in a Primary School!!


This meant there were all the usual things and as always a long list: Christmas Fayre, Christmas Production (for which I was the lighting engineer – yet another thing on the job description!), Children’s Christmas Dinner (Washer up and construction of the most outlandish hat!), Service at St Katharine’s Church (Readings and Order of Service), Nativity in the woods (cameraman and general helper as you can’t beat a day in the woods, despite a hundred and one things to do in the office!),  Christmas Parties, Christmas Disco (hotdog purchaser and cook!), so all in all normally an extra busy time for all!


But, although I didn’t expect people to particularly make a razzmatazz about my departure, those of you who know me well, will know that I wasn’t going to go quietly!!  For some time I had been thinking about what I should do for my swansong and had been mulling around and jotting down a number of ideas, which with “the end” in sight needed to be planned fairly quickly before I was picked up in the Christmas rush and rushed headlong into departure before I was good and ready.  So it was at one of our weekly SMALT meetings (Senior Management and Learning Team – someone on high had miraculously decided that schools were places of learning, so in due deference to the powers that be we decided to rechristen our SMT!!), that I broached the subject of my fading away gracefully without a fuss!  I told my management team that I had a few ideas and they said that they had also been thinking of one or two ideas, so to be polite I let them go first.  They suggested a weekend Staff Walk and Lunch for me to organise. A whole school Christmas Walk up Robinswood Hill that overlooks the back of the school and they thought it would be great if I did some French cooking with some of the children!!  I then produced my list which was almost exactly the same except for the last item where I replaced some with all of the children, but more of that in a bit.  I had obviously been at Moat School too long and it was time to move on, as the staff knew exactly what I was thinking!!


So a few more things for the list, and briefly a great staff walk took place and it was really touching that virtually everyone turned up despite the day being a little cold and damp, and I think a good time was had by all.  The whole school walk was as always great fun and not as wet as the most memorable of these, when as we were all picnicking on the far side of Robinswood Hill a few drops of rain fell and I was heard to say “rain what rain?, what a fuss about nothing!”  Then within twenty minutes or so, just long enough for us to get to the top of the hill, we had the heaviest downpour I have ever experienced in the UK, of true tropical monsoon proportions, and we were quite literally washed off the top of the hill slipping and sliding all the way back to school, with at least one member of staff careering into a nettle patch and no-one arriving back at school with anything dry – fortunately, despite the weather it was summer and not too cold, and despite the staff swearing never to go walking with me again (as well as swearing at me quietly under their breaths!!), it was the walk everyone always remembered and fondly talked about, and there were several more!!


Then there was the French food!  Rather that cooking up a few croissants or the odd French Fancy, I had decided to invite all the children and staff to a three course French meal, in Restaurant Perroquet that was to be set up in one of the classrooms that had recently been fitted out with a cooking area and quite a lot of cooking utensils.  As you may imagine, a fairly standard English classroom would be hard pushed to accommodate 200 odd people for dinner, so I had decided that each of the school’s four teams and associated staff would be invited to four separate dinners with upwards of 45 people at each.  The menu was planned (see below) and a captive workforce enlisted – the children and some of the staff! - who under my supervision were to prepare the food that they then sat down to eat instead of school dinners.  Basically, a great time was had by all and as each meal came and went the chef’s outfit’s became more and more outlandish and by the end as the children shouted “Yes Chef” to my barked orders, which in the heat of the moment and the kitchen I had to remember not to do my Gordon Ramsey impersonation, they were looking at me in my trendy multi-coloured hippy trousers, loud shirt and red pirate headscarf, someone once said I wasn’t your average Headteacher and I can’t think why!!

Le Restaurant Perroquet ~ Chambre Twyver
(The Parrot Restaurant ~ Twyver Room)
(pour 40 personne)
(for 40 people)
**********
Omelette fine herbes
(Fine herb omelette)
**********
Tranche de rôtir fillet de porc avec cassoulet lentille
(Sliced roast pork fillet with lentil casserole)
**********
Tarte pomme avec crème fraîche
(Apple Tart with crème fraîche)
**********
“vin” rouge et “vin” blanc
(red and white “wine”)
**********
Tuesday 11th November 2008    ~   Maple Team
Wednesday 19th November 2008  ~  Oak Team
Tuesday 25th November 2008   ~    Ash Team
Thursday 27th November 2008   ~   Thorn Team
Salut et merci beaucoup!

At Christmas we always had a Staff Evening out and this had been duly arranged at a local hotel.  It was on a particularly miserable night, but we more than made up for it inside and pleasant things were said about me, but I was prepared, not with a box of tissues, although it was a close run thing at times!, no I had written an action poem, the first surprise, featuring everyone there, complete with props and dressing up items, the expression on the waitress’s face was priceless and we all went home happy, but with the end in sight!


Then, there was the next surprise, although not totally unexpected when during one of the assemblies in the last week, I did one of my near legendary pantomimes, well the staff and I did a pantomime, but they hadn’t been told before and simply got given a script, a bag containing a costume and the rest was left to chance.   As always, in true panto fashion, I was the leading lady (and contrary to popular believe these pantomimes were virtually the only time I dressed up in women’s clothing!!) and usually got “married” at the end to the Headteacher when I was deputy and the deputy when I was head – Oh yes I did!! 


The next surprise was for me as the very next day, the staff held their own surprise panto and yes I was the panto dame and the butt of all the jokes as well as receiving not one but several custard pies towards the end, they must have known there wasn’t time for disciplinary procedures before I was due to leave the country.  But, the tables were well and truly reversed and they had even managed to secretly practise their parts, it wasn’t until afterwards that I understood the significance of so many shouts of “He’s behind you!” as I wandered around the school on mundane matters such as checking the temperature of the water in the children’s washrooms – not as you may think to prevent them scalding themselves, Health and Safety insisted I put up a sign in the staff washrooms saying “Caution, Hot Water may be HOT!!” but not in the children’s!!  No it was to check the temperatures were within the desired range to stop the build up of legionella, the bug that causes legionellosis!  Did I mention that on the job description!


With the end of term virtually upon us, there were few other surprises, except on the last afternoon, but you’ll have to wait for that one until next time.  That said, although I knew about the after school tea party, my deputy feeling she should invite me in case I went off somewhere else and left everyone eating the cakes, drinking the tea and talking amongst themselves, some of the visitors who came were a surprise and at times like that you start to think about what you will shortly be leaving behind and wondering if you’ve done the right thing.  This was particularly evident when I gave the speech I had prepared earlier, in French as well as in English, not knowing that the school’s peripatetic French teacher would be there – from the cringes on her face, it was apparent that my French had some way to go!!


So much for winding down, but the end was looming rather frighteningly and rapidly, and then there was the last formal communication to parents and I quote:

And finally ~ Au revoir from Mr. Higgs

Dear All

As my final day at Moat looms it’s becoming harder and is not helped when; walking down the corridor the other day, one of the children whispers to me “I’m sad that you’re leaving!” and others say things like you will send us a postcard or come in and tell us how you’re getting on!  And, now my final Newsletter to you all.

The last nearly eight years have been an incredible journey, starting with two schools and ending up with one, that I am very proud to have been associated with.  Sometimes this journey seems to have gone by with breakneck speed until I reflect on all that has happened during that time, none of which could have happened without working alongside an amazing group of colleagues, who have an energy and drive (all for the well-being of your children) that never ceases to amaze me.  These colleagues have also been great fun to work with and through their untiring support; my job has been made very easy!

Then, there are the children who I will miss the most; their genuine warmth and good nature have made getting up and coming to school in the morning so worthwhile.  Thank you to all of them for also helping to make my time at Moat so memorable!

Also, thank you, for all your support and friendship over the years, and I look forward to receiving news from Moat, Matson and Robinswood and beyond as the children move through the school and become equipped for the wider world and hopefully a great future. 

And …… finally, my reply to the whisper in the corridor …… “I’m also very sad to be leaving, but also excited about the adventures that lie ahead,” also whispered and somewhat wistfully, and yes I’ll certainly let you know how we’re getting on!

Love and best wishes, as well as a Happy Christmas  

Roger M. Higgs


The House! 

For this section it is where to start as well as where to finish, as this part alone could quite easily make the basis for several average sized missives!  Well as the title of this missive confirms, we went from a hovel with unsafe electrical installations and basic, very ancient and filthy plumbing to being able to live in the house, albeit without a shower or a kitchen sink and using a temporary “camp kitchen” set up in the cave, which in this instance isn’t underground but on the ground floor behind the kitchen, for the first week or two!  Washing up necessitated using an “outside” tap in the workshop and boiling a kettle, and friends came to our rescue in matters of personal hygiene, I think they got a whiff when we invited them around for a coffee for them to see the progress we had made on the house!  In fact we were already using their Wi-Fi and telephone to badger France Telecom and keep in touch with the outside world, so a glass of wine or two and a shower were logical extras to be offered by this first rate “Cyber Cafe!!!”

Unfortunately, due to it being August and France largely shutting down for “vacance,” when we returned from York in mid August expecting the electrical and plumbing work to have been finished, we had a bit of a surprise, but once the project manager returned from his holiday and a few days later and realised that nobody was chasing things up in his absence, experience telling us that this is not uncommon!  But, he was furious and pulled out all the stops to get the final tidying up and hole filling finished so we could fit the sink, shower and second, downstairs toilet.  However, all in all we were very pleased with the work done by the electricians and plumbers, although initially they moved in a little like a demolition squad, knocking large holes in our very thick walls and giving the general structure of the house a thorough working over!  For the first few days of the 45 (from officially getting the key) our efforts to do anything consistently were rather thwarted by having to work around the artisans, but we soon established a routine, finding out which bits of our house we could work on so as to be out of the workmen’s way, whilst giving them strict instructions to tell us to “ALLEZ, ALLEZ” should we be in their way, after all without water and electricity we would have been kyboshed as regards a move at the end of August.  As it happened, with the limitations mentioned above , we moved in a couple of days before the end of the month, allowing us to clean through the emptied La Loge, for a few days, before cracking on again with the new abode.  That bit was really rather frustrating, as we had moved and needed to concentrate on moving forwards, but also needed to leave the old house in a suitable state to have our deposit returned, handy for buying a few more tins of paint, rolls of insulation or the like!!

Now, having been in 65 days of which we have spent 3 in Paris enjoying fantastic late summer sunshine, 15 in the UK much of it in the same sunshine and have had visitors for 26 days (thank you Anne and Steve and Maggie and Bryan for forgetting that holidays are meant for relaxing!) leaving only 21 days in our new house on our own working!!  Indeed, Saturday evening was the first time it had just been the two of us for dinner for nearly 8 weeks, but it’s great to see people and it helps to keep us sane and showing people around also helps to remind us of all we have done, much of it not always apparent; fitting lights, the plumbing under sinks and showers, the toilets, a bit of beading here or there, a replaced pane of glass, filling or sealing cracks etc. etc. etc. etc. and some more – much of it very time consuming particularly when it was jobs we have never undertaken before!  I guess you are beginning to get the picture, which makes me think that perhaps the best way to let you know how things are coming on is to show you, as words fail me!, so there follows some before and after pictures, which at least tell a part of the story, what they don’t seem to show, looking at them again, is the dirt and squalor of the before pictures after 5 years of non-habitation and a good few years before that of existing rather than living!!



The Cave, note the wine racks went in rather quickly and in the foreground is work in progress!


 The kitchen, yellow and blue, loosely based on Monet’s dining room at Giverney!


The “French Room” We inherited the armoire in the first picture with the house, it was too big to get out of the room so now, with a good degree of huffing and puffing, it is now to the left of this photo!







The Study with Linda hard at work on the right, probably checking the France Telecom bill!  Also from where this and future missives will be transmitted, via cyberspace, to you France Telecom permitting!
Our bedroom with fan strategically placed for those hot balmy nights, but the heater is about
to go in should the weather turn cold!

The upstairs bathroom created out of a sort of loft space at the end of upstairs, there is also a new WC and washbasin in the cubicle on the left of the first picture.
The downstairs loo, and yes it is a urinal in the first picture now replaced with a washbasin, but carefully removed for posterity – it’s going to have a plant in it in our new hidden courtyard!

From these I think you get the idea, however finally ... the view from our “new” roof garden, above our hidden courtyard garden, with the roof of the next door gîte in the foreground. The Secret Garden was one of my favourite books as a child, that and the Arthur Ransome Swallows and Amazons Series, all about adventures and creating dens – a bit like history repeating itself!!:


But, there is rather a lot to do before we can sit and enjoy the view!!
One day this will be our hidden walled courtyard, complete with outside urinal!!  You may just be able to spot it, waiting to go up, by the post under the ladder!


So, as you will see we have made some progress with, as you see above lots still to do, but with a view like that above it’s worth waiting for!!

Not wanting to start a new section, a quick update on The Garden: the compost bin, water butt and washing line are all in and being used, Linda has done quite a bit of planting and the final corner that hasn’t been cleared has been trimmed up considerably so we can see where we are.  But the most important news is that the caravan is in the garden, on the hard standing that we constructed for it.  It was a bit of a struggle and may never come out again, but it meant we were completely out of La Loge and the caravan is not causing a nuisance for the new tenant that seems to have moved in!  The fun will start in the spring when we try to get it out again!!  

Oh la la!

Someone nearby has caught both my eye and more importantly my imagination, and this person for reasons of confidentiality will assume a false name and carry the caveat, that events and persons herein mentioned are fictitious and any resemblance to living individuals is purely coincidental!!

So starts the story, or should that be secret tryst, of Enrique, as hot-blooded a Frenchman as you might find anywhere between Biarritz and Lille, or indeed Brest and Nice and I use the last two places quite intentionally because he certainly knows a nice one when he sees one!!  They do say that it is often the quiet one’s that you should watch, but there’s nothing quiet about Enrique, not least because he is slightly deaf and consequently plays the love songs of Charles Aznavour at a volume that would deafen most people and indeed stroll passed his house and even with the window’s tightly shut, your ears might be assailed, if not assaulted, by such gems as “Avant de t'aimer” or “Before I loved you”!!!  
 Avant de t'aimer, je croyais que les femmes étaient des églises
Comme aux quatre coins de Venise et qu'on pouvait les visiter
Avant de t'aimer, je disais qu'elles n'étaient que gourmandise
Comme le sont les friandises et qu'on pouvait les partager
     
Which roughly translates as:
Before I loved you, I thought that women were churches
Like you find at the four corners of Venice, and that you could visit them
Before I loved you, I said that they were nothing but sweets
Like bonbons, and that you could share them

I hear you say “They don’t write them like that anymore!” to which I also hear you respond: “Thank Goodness!!”  Interestingly, ideas of love and even friendship seem to have moved on in modern day France, and in the book I’m reading at the moment – “An Englishman in Paris L’éducation continentale” by Michael Sadler, which is described by HRH Prince Charles as “Wonderfully amusing”, has a very amusing chapter in which friendship between men and women in France is discussed. Amongst other pieces, some of which might not be suitable for the sensibilities or moral scruples of my readership, suggests that; “... friendship between a man and a woman is only possible after penetration” and this discussion takes place at a dinner party at which the author is, at this early stage in the book, a relative stranger!  But, I digress!!

This does give you the idea that Enrique could be an old romantic or maybe simply too hard of hearing to be able to make out the lyrics, let alone the sentiments, perhaps he just likes the melody!!  However, he is also rather racy and prone to over revving - the engine of his car that is, again I suspect a byproduct of his deafness, but making it very noticeable when he passes and alerting you to his comings and goings

Hot blooded he may be, but seemingly alone, that is until his revving engine alerted us to his departure, but despite being in all day wasn’t heard again that day, despite the fact that his shutters remained open and there wasn’t a light to be seen.  I could only conclude that he hadn’t sneaked back undetected, come back in a taxi either the worst for wear or having had a mishap / breakdown in the car, but that the absence was not planned, and perhaps due more to a fertile imagination than anything else the result of his luck being in and friendship consummated!!  Unfortunately, it seemed as though it were to be short lived, as early the next morning the revving engine and grinding gears could be heard traversing the valley and back to his own abode and more importantly his own lonely bed.

Several days went by and I could only assume that love and indeed friendship hadn’t blossomed and he could once again be heard playing his collection of Charlie’s love songs, perhaps, although my ability to translate quickly made it impossible to tell, particularly those of unrequited love.  On the contrary, there I may be wrong, as only a few days later, with the car working overtime, he left the valley obviously on a promise of friendship as the shutters were carefully closed and too date, several days later the valley hasn’t reverberated to the sounds of Enrique, be it racing combustion engine or rapidly turning black plastic disc!  I do however think that on his return, the song may have gone up a little in tempo or at least sentiment!!

 L'amour c'est comme un jour:

Le soleil brille à pleins feux, Mais je ne vois que tes yeux
La blancheur de ton corps nu, Devant mes mains éperdues
Viens, ne laisse pas s’enfuir, Les matins brodés d’amour
Viens, ne laisse pas mourir, Les printemps, nos plaisirs
Or more or less precisely: Love is like a day:
The sun shines full of fire, But I just see your eyes
The whiteness of your naked body, In front of my passionate hands
Come, don't let run away, The mornings embroidered of love
Come, don't let die, The spring, our pleasures

And who said romance was dead!!!  I’ve finished the book mentioned above and wonder if Enrique finally went the full course whilst explaining the rules of cricket to his new mate, or should that be batting partner, the author of the book did!!  Watch this space!!

La réponse est Troene, or The answer is Troene!

But I hear you all collectively say – Quelle est la question or What is the question?  Well, those of you who have visited us over the last few months may remember and indeed become embroiled in earnest discussion both about the colour of the green shutters of the gîte opposite our new house and/or what colour our own shutters will be when we get around to it!

Well, the long and short of it was that I was all for a calming countryside green and Linda wanted an altogether out of place marine style blue, you can tell I’m biased!!  I’ve got to say I rather dug my foot in, being as we are in the heart of the French countryside and would have been the first to put my oar in had we been remotely anywhere near the sea, as I felt strongly that marine blue was for a pretty white cottage next to the sea!  At times emotions ran high as we searched the colour charts for something on which we could agree, and that would truly reflect the rural nature of our new house!!  These searches were largely in vane as Linda was to be found in the blue aisle and I was in the green and it seemed that never the twain would meet and the existing cream shutters would go quietly shabby chic!!

But, those of you who know me well will vouch for the fact that I’m a reasonable fellow and as Linda pointed out cream hardly makes a statement, and so for reasons of marital bliss, I happened to point out a greyey-blue wooden house nearby and started the ball rolling with a that’s not a bad colour.  At least it started the conversation as at that point we were sitting next to each other in the car and not in different aisles of one of the numerous DIY shops that we currently frequent on rather a regular basis!!  At this point, remember the nuptial harmony, the fact that I felt it wasn’t a bad colour for the side of a sleek sail boat was immaterial, the seed was set for a move away from blue to grey-blue to ......

Then it happened, we were approaching a roundabout it took all my driving skills to avoid a collision with a Toyota Yaris that was coming around the roundabout, as we both “to a person” pointed at it excitiedly and said that’s the colour – agreement at last.  So it was that a decision was made and we settled for grey-blue, well I did, Linda settled for blue-grey, so near harmony was established and it at least meant we were in the same aisle when looking at the colour charts and we, after much soul searching and many visits narrowed it down to a paint at Mr Bricolage, erroneously called “bleu petrole” despite being clearly on the grey side of the petrol spectrum, but maybe the “paint name executive” lived near the sea and had a penchant for blue or was simply grey phobic! 

All this could have been academic, as painting the shutters was low on the list of priorities, until two things happened almost simultaneously; first the fenêtre de la cuisine (kitchen window), the only downstairs shutters, were in danger of falling apart which meant we had to purchase some new ones in bare wood, but that alone was not enough to send us to the paint department of Mr Bricolage.  It was more the second event that had us hastening to the paint tins, as visitors last week, good friends Maggie and Bryan from Stroud, desperate to help with the house preparations noticed that the window surrounds that had been painted a very light greyey-blue were not only flaking but also in places in need of a bit of repair and restoration.  The filler and mortar were duly mixed and the smart new flake and hole free surrounds were simply crying out for a nice new coat of paint.  So armed with a large flake or two of the existing colour off we went to match that and to buy the wrongly labelled “blue petrole” paint. 

If there is a “saviour” for those people about to purchase large quantities of paint, they came to our rescue at this point, as the only tins available were 500ml at 15 a throw, a rather strange expression as at that price we certainly wouldn’t be throwing it around!!  But, for a little over 40 we could, had they had any in stock, have purchased 2.5 litres a huge saving I’m sure even the most mathematically challenged of you would agree!  So we decided to wait and go on to the next shop, primarily to try and match the paint for the surrounds, as Mr B had nothing suitable, as well as purchasing the odd other few items that would keep us busy over the next few days, and our nearest enormous Brico Depot, a French version of B & Q Depot and with the same owners, seemed a good bet.  For reasons of nostalgia we decided to repeat the previous several attempts to find a suitable colour for the shutters, we had been to so many places looking we had lost the plot and kept looking in the same places, and then it happened again that seminal moment when we both looked, saw, internalised and agreed and for good measure it was around 40 for FIVE litres and mixed to order!!!  It was just a case of checking that it wasn’t sold in 5 litre tins and 40 PER LITRE a trick that is not uncommon in French DIY shops.  But no, it was indeed a bargain and duly mixed and in the chariot (trolley) before you could say ... oh the colour, well that’s the answer – Troene, a sort of statement making greyey-blue, or bluey-grey if you’re asking Linda!!  I’ve just looked up the Toyota website and discovered the colour we both really wanted is “magnetic grey metallic” – c’est la vie!

Before I forget, we also found an exact match for the window and door surrounds, again one to be mixed and with another typical French quirk barely much more for ten litres than five and it’s now looking very smart on the downstairs of the front of our house, the upstairs being in much better condition and matching perfectly, and waiting for the Troene shutters to finish the statement. Oh, and the colour: 718460 RC 198 gris d’angou 8 100% facade pilolite, but being a reasonable man I’d say it was nearer to pale egg shell blue than grey!!

Just thought that perhaps I should look up Troene in the French dictionary and I must say was just a little surprised to find it means privet, now ...... who was it that wanted green!!!     

Ici devant nous!”

Yesterday was T-Day for us in France, or for my English readers R or T-Day, T in French for toit or tuiles or roof and tiles for the monolinguists amongst you, and my spell check would have me believe I have just “invented” a new word which I believe to be self explanatory!

Yes, with the two months for viewing and objections, well and truly elapsed since we put out the planning notice and the last of this year’s visitors left to return to the UK, we couldn’t put off the roof renovations – to the dependancies (outbuildings) any longer as we want to have then finished for the first visitors of next year.  But, on looking back to previous missives, I fear I have jumped the gun slightly here.  The roof over the house, cave and workshop is sound and fairly recent, but wrapped around one side and part of the front of the house is a barn, animal byre and a garage with stout stone walls but suspect roof.  In a moment of divine inspiration I solved the problem, at least in principle, of only having a small and rather public courtyard in front of the house and rather close to our neighbour’s bedroom window over the road.  So potentially a problem on those long balmy evenings, as the neighbours go to bed early, rise early and seem never to stop during the waking hours, making the public nature of the existing courtyard a further problem should we ever get the time for a leisurely cup of tea or indeed time to sit in the sunshine and read a book!

We decided that we would, and we being the operative word, as house renovation comes quite expensive and the more we can do ourselves the better, even if it is things we have never tried before – it’s amazing what time, money (or lack of it) and a bit of ingenuity can do, take off the roof and replace it only on the barn and garage, leaving the byre open to the sky whilst retaining the walls.  We were to create our own hidden courtyard or secret garden behind the garage, which in turn is to be turned into a summer kitchen and covered terrace for when the sun is too hot or the endless hot days have built into a thundery evening and it is too wet to eat outside but too sultry to eat in! Sorted!

Well not quite, not only is there the little problem of; removing the tiles, saving the best and using the old broken ones as infill for the very uneven floor, sorting out any rotten timbers, tiling the top of the courtyard wall and then reroofing the barn and garage area, there was also the problem of obtaining the proper and correct permissions to allow such work to be carried out.  Extensive research by Linda identified the project as “minor works” needing a form to be obtained from the Mayor and for this to be filled in, returned to the Mayor for approval by the local council, which assuming it was granted then requires the above mentioned planning notice to be displayed for two months before work commences and to stay in place until the work has been completed.  The permission lasts for two years before needing renewal, but for reasons stated above we were keen to get started.  Then once completed a further form has to be completed to let the Mayor know the work is finished and allow the Council to inspect if they so wish!  

We got the form without too much trouble and due to the minor nature of the work (although at the moment it doesn’t feel all that minor!!) it was a relatively easy form to fill in, but interestingly needed to be accompanied by photographs of the affected area as well as photographs of the finished work, before both permission was granted and the work commenced!!!  A tall order you might think and one that relies solely on retrospective planning applications, but not so, web research had solved the problem – submit two sets of the same photographs and on the second by use of a hi-tech drawing system, namely a black pen, draw on the area to be affected by the works.  And, it worked!!!  In a relatively short space of time we had a full copy of our application returned, liberally stamped and signed by the Mayor giving us permission to go ahead.

Hence T-Day, the start of the work, but why is this section entitled “Here before us!”?  Well, obviously the planning procedure was here before us and like much of French bureaucracy seems to have undergone over the years a process of complification (another new word!) rather than simplification.  No, it’s been a long winded way of arriving at it but it’s the tiles that were here before us, and with a long and distinguished history to boot!  Most of the tiles on our dependancies are of a Roman design that has changed very little over the centuries and although some are more modern replacements; replacing those that had become damaged over the years.  But, many are the original handmade tiles that would have been on the roof when it was first constructed and indeed it is these very old tiles that seem to have weathered better that their modern replacements. The tiles in question are those that are a bit like half a cone with the point cut off and are laid alternatively curved up or down, making a heavy and effective weather tight roof.  Traditionally these tile were, as I said before, manmade with a rectangle of clay rolled into a shallow mould and then the distinctive tapering curve created by the tile maker bending them over their thigh, and from the many hundred we have removed over the last two days I can tell you that the tile makers of yesteryear, who were here long before us had some very funny shaped thighs!!       

My original “thought!” 

I’m a little worried, first there was An Englishman in Paris, the book mentioned above, with a torrid sex scene featuring the rules of cricket!!  Then the very next book I select, Tuscany for Beginners, Love and War in a Hot Climate by Imogen Edwards-Jones, starts off with a further torrid sex scene between the main character’s husband and best friend and next door neighbour (one and the same person I hasten to add!).  But actually, in both cases the books will be more memorable for the recipes and food depicted – maybe I should be worried!!  
Kind regards, Best Wishes and Love,      

Roger and Linda

And, next time, in Missive 34 ~ Further adventures of Hameau Tranquille ~ Le homme
 avec le pinceau  and, Chapter 5 – “Reality!!”   

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