Christmas Missive December 2012



 

Dear All

Just finished the Christmas cards and both commented on how for the first time for several years there were no deletions, nobody no longer with us, no empty chairs as it were.  But, it’s not the time to be maudlin, ‘tis once again the season to be jolly.  So having a couple of days ago donned the red suit and doled out the presents to the assembled children of the parish – Ho! Ho! Ho!, and here we go again!  ...... This time last year we were in our new house and most of the rooms were habitable, except the downstairs en suite bathroom, which we have subsequently discovered used to be a two horse stable, with our bedroom above part of the hayloft!  Our return to France after last Christmas was delayed a little as the UK Passport Office didn’t like my new photo (couldn’t believe how good looking I was!) and wanted something to play down the stunning looks, although Linda thinks it was the use of a French photo booth!!  But, we were straight back to the stable renovation, in readiness for our first visitors at Easter, (it will have been a record breaking 33 this year!) as well as trying in vain a lot of the time, to get back to work on the barn / summer kitchen roofs. Winter in the Vendée was wet for much of the time and for several weeks for once colder than back in the UK, with a couple of snowy periods, one that went on for some time with unprecedented cold temperatures – for one week the frozen snow meant we weren’t able to get the car out of the hamlet and the bread van and post couldn’t get in.  Thank goodness for the freezer, but more of that later!

Once the septic tank company had caught up after the inclement weather, they got around to us and for a few days the peace and tranquillity was once again shattered as they drilled out the solid rock in front of the house for a large 3000l tank and a modern micro-station that much to the consternation of the neighbours doesn’t require a sand bed filter.  We had to get the salesman to convince them it was indeed cutting edge technology rather than us pulling a fast one!!  And as such technology doesn’t come cheap; it doesn’t get the use that it might, as we can’t afford the food necessary to feed such a system!!!!  But, joking aside, we were able to get the garden dug over and due to the previous incumbents (the chickens) not having the use of modern facilities, the soil is amazingly fertile and we grew lots of fresh produce and filled the freezers, which sadly failed in the wet weather that the Vendée had whilst we were in the UK in October – fortunately, friends found them defrosted before they started to rot and were able to re-freeze the ruined stuff for us to sort out on our return – oh c’est la vie as they say in these parts!!

Our October visit to the UK, also ended up extended as my Dad had to have a major op, from which he has made a good recovery, and will hopefully be back driving again and able to take my Mum for her two daily shopping fix!  But, this ended up our only trip away this year, the caravan languishing unused in the garden.  But we are hopefully going to remedy this next year with an Easter trip to Biarritz being planned, as well as more “Pet Shop” duty in York as most of Linda’s sister’s family go to Africa on safari in February.      

Briefly, the rest of the family:  Daniel and Lisa who are joining us for Christmas in France this year, which will be the first time they have seen our new house.  They remain very busy, Lisa working long hours in Cheltenham as well as continuing to run the local St. John Badger set and Daniel working during term time as a cover supervisor in a Gloucester secondary school and working school holidays at a local leisure centre.  He is also very busy with St John running the local Adult Division and increasing his Child Protection role.  We were able to help them with block paving their drive when we visited in October, which will help with parking which is a problematic in their busy road.

Victoria and Dermot are still in Plymouth, Victoria’s job being made permanent.  She has been working very hard a s a new teacher getting to grips with all that entails , as well as taking on the role of Duke of Edinburgh Scheme co-ordinator  They also bought a house in the middle of the year – a real bargain, dint of needing a vast amount of work doing on it.  But they have both been working very hard on the renovations and it is really taking shape and will be a lovely large house (previously two flats over four floors!) when they have finished, at least they have managed to get the heating in time for the colder weather.  Fortunately, Dermot’s submarine is in for a refit so he has had a lot of time for DIY!!  All her work, and perhaps the expense of becoming a house owner, well at least a mortgage payer, slightly curtailed her wanderlust this year, only managed the Isles of Scilly, France and Switzerland, but is already looking to next year – so far; Austria (partly with work), France/Spain, Holland (with school) and somewhere tba in the summer!!

Well, once again Joyeuse Fêtes as they say in France.  Remember, this is but a brief Family Christmas Missive for more “what we’re doing” visit the blog http://ithappenedonethursdayinfebruary.blogspot.com , or for a more esoteric offerings try the new blog: http://rogerscreativeurge.blogspot.com !! 

Love from



Roger and Linda

 

Nature in all its fury!

Quel monde formidable or loosely translated ~

What a wonderful world!

It’s certainly a wonderful, albeit at times formidable, world and the elements can often seem unstoppable as demonstrated recently, when our peaceful village roared to the sound of the normally gently flowing burbling brook turning into a raging torrent after in excess of 24 hours of very heavy showers and more prolonged rain.  Funnily enough almost 12 months to the day since we last saw this, although I think it happened more recently, when we were away in England.

The pictures, before and after, speak for themselves:

“Our” stream

 

 

 

                                         click to play the video

Our garden

 

 

 

click to play the video

The Ford

 

As you can see we couldn’t get across the bridge or wade through the ford to take the picture the other side!

On the way back from taking some pictures we met our neighbour who wanted to know if Linda had had a good time in England, and had she gone from St Malo on the ferry, he then added, with that twinkle he has in his eyes, particularly just after lunch!, that if it continues to rain for much longer we could take a boat to England from the bottom of the garden!!

 

Why The Vendée

We are often asked the above question, and although it was in some ways “luck” there is a long version of the story that I’m sure many of you have already heard, if not ask us next time you see us!

But, for the moment suffice to say that The Vendée reputedly has as many days sunshine as Mediterranean coast of France and has nowhere near as many Brits as the Dordogne, which has at least one English language newspaper and it is not uncommon for UK cars to outnumber French ones in the local supermarket!

Linda left me on Friday, no no, not permanently or indeed due to anything I said, she went to England, Plymouth to be precise for a girlie weekend with Victoria and various other girlie members of the family!!  So I have been left busy doing various and seemingly not ending DIY projects, feeding myself (although friends down the road must think I’m neglecting myself and wasting away as they have invited me to eat with them on two of the evenings!), a bit of walking, keeping the home fires burning as we’re having a cold snap and I even figured out the washing machine as I was running out of warm socks due to the cold spell!!  In addition to this I’ve been busy on the computer with emails, blogs and even editing the website of the Association of Countryside Volunteers, for which I am the Vice Chair and Editor – all in all a thoroughly modern man, so much so that I was quite horrified when I joined a group of French walkers at the weekend and the end a wall was used as a make shift table for refreshments – biscuits washed down with wine for the men and orange juice for the women and it wasn’t that all the women had drawn the short straw and were driving, no it’s just the way it is hereabouts!!  Can’t help feeling it was a good thing Linda was away, she’d have rocked the boat, if not grabbed the wine bottle!!  But equality in France, the country of Liberté, égalité, fraternité, is another story, to which one day I may carefully return!

I mentioned emails above and one of them was a request, for a reference, for an ex-colleague, they even track me down in deepest rural France, the wonders of technology!  It appears that I’m no longer an institution (thank the lord!!) and for “reasons of compliance” a hard copy of the reference must be posted and an emailed version is not acceptable!!  The form duly printed and filled in and I find that the envelope marked England blue , was empty – it’s the envelope of stamps for sending to England and they’re blue in case you’re wondering, so I needed to go the local village for stamps and the post box.  Interestingly, if the envelope had contained a stamp, I could have stuck it on the letter when I had finished the form, popped downstairs around the back of the house and put it in our post box (an actual box!) remembering to flick over the red tab to alert the postie that there was a letter TO COLLECT – what a brilliant service and one we only recently discovered, thought it was only for older people who couldn’t get out and about very easily.  I’ve not tried it yet but apparently you can, if you haven’t got a stamp, leave money with the letter and the postie will do the rest, bringing back the change the next day if necessary!!!  The fact that it was a blue stamp I needed not a red one for post within France, I thought it best not to risk it!

Arriving in the local village, I visited the Mairie, the Mayor’s office, not because I wanted to chat local politics or the like, but because at the back in a small room is a small bureau of La Poste, with all the normal services including banking.  This is France’s response to the mounting cost of running rural Post Office branches, they don’t shut them they downsize them and put them into municipal buildings – what an inspired and eminently sensible solution!  Having entered the building I found there was someone in the bureau and one person waiting outside; the French take confidentiality and privacy very seriously and it might I suppose be banking matters being discussed, therefore queuing customers are requested to wait in the corridor with seating provided.

I “Bonjoured” the gentleman who was waiting and moved down the queue.  We were then joined by a lady who we both “Bonjoured madam” as she took her place in the queue, the customer in the office obviously had a lot of business to cover!  A man then entered and started to ask the lady, in fast French, something about the village hall, and as she seemed as confused as I was trying to keep up, the man at the front of the queue said “Oh! You’re English” to her, to which I responded that by quite a coincidence so was I, as was the man!  Three English people in a row, the lady deciding it must be because Christmas is looming and we were all posting early for Christmas, the French don’t really do Christmas cards!!  Then, when the door opened and another lady joined us it seemed almost natural to greet her in English as well, and you’ve guessed it, it was now four in a row – what did I say about the Dordogne!!  I often wonder when such a coincidence occurs what the odds of it happening would be, but it would take a better mathematician that me to work it out, I’ll just stand in awe!  

Having finally got my stamps, said “I guess its good bye rather than au revoir” to the queue, which was fortunately still devoid of a French person, they might not have understood, I left and the boulangerie caught my eye!!  Well, Linda had talked about the chocolate brownies they had been eating!  I decided a treat was in order and asked for a La Festive, a rather chewy but incredibly tasty brownish baguette, just as the religieuse caught my eye – a patisserie that is rather wicked despite the name!  So, somewhat sadly I ordered one, sad in the same way that I sometimes find people in restaurants dining alone, and was delighted to see it was duly put into a cake box that could quite easily hold three or even four of these calorie rich treats said to resemble nuns!!  On the way home I also thought that that the neighbours wouldn’t spot my sad individual cake, thinking instead that I’d bought a welcome home cake for Linda, she’s due home tomorrow.  Rather ironically, later in the afternoon one of the friends down the road called in to invite me down to share the curry they were having, so the religieuse languishes all alone in the fridge and I’m left with a dilemma; elevenses before going to meet Linda off the train, half each for tea tomorrow or buy another one and argue about who’s going to have the fresh one!  Life can be so stressful!!!  

P.S. We shared it, well she does proof read the blog posts, but we did find something equally rich and lovely for the other half!!  religieusesreligieuses

Quel monde formidable or loosely translated ~

What a wonderful world!

(with thanks to Google translate, not that I needed it in this case! – call it a comfort blanket! -and Bob Thiele (as "George Douglas") and George David Weiss, who wrote the song Louis Armstrong made famous!)

 I’ve said on more than one occasion that it’s great to have the time to stand and stare, take photographs and generally marvel at the wonders of the natural world that are all around us and constantly changing.  Just the other day I was reading an old copy of Country Walking magazine, and in it was an article about a children’s writer and illustrator, called Jackie Morris, and I was particularly struck by two things she said.  First, she said that she never minded doing the same walk over and over again, as she always saw something new and it changed with the seasons and over time, a sentiment I’m sure most of us would agree with, with the proviso that sometimes new walks and places are equally good.  Secondly, and I was vividly reminded of this when driving Linda to the ferry very early the other morning, those that know me well will realise that early mornings don’t feature much as I’m rather prone to burn the midnight oil – indeed as I write this the minute hand is rapidly climbing towards the “witching hour!”  But, back to that early still dark morning, heading north towards St Malo as the dawn was trying to break, but the black clouds of racing storms were doing there upmost to prevent daybreak!! Jackie Morris describes how she loves walking in a particular place “at the beginning of the day, when all the colours are washing into everything.”  What a wonderful image and this was it in dramatic action, this morning, from my study window!!
 

Back in the days of the original blog, when the select few amongst you received a varied monthly blog of our exploits, my thoughts and rants and anything else that took my fancy, for some time I wrote a section called “Ici devant nous” or “Here before us,” which often chronicled the amazing flora and fauna around and about.  Well, I suppose in a way this is a return, as I intend this to continue as a “monthlyish” offering.  As always, hedging my bets, not because I’m worried about finding suitable copy, no more concerned that there will be too many amazing things going on to restrict myself to once a month!

 

As the intro has gone on a little this time, I’m going to confine myself to just one rather funny incident, which again took place just outside my study window.  A few mornings ago we had our first significant frost, and awoke to a white world.  Needing logs for the fire I went to collect some from the barn and was puzzled by what appeared to be much frantic bird activity in the leaves of the beautiful mulberry tree in our neighbours garden.  Had it been spring with a plentiful crop of tasty fruit I wouldn’t have been at all surprised, instead have checked to see if the magnificent pair of golden orioles that gorged there earlier in the year had returned.

Closer inspection brought a smile to my face, as the bird activity was actually an avalanche of the huge leaves that had been clinging on to the tree, despite most other trees having lost all their leaves.  I guess the frost was the final trigger and rather like visiting a barber for a number one, what had been a magnificent head of leaves, now lay in a thick carpet around the foot of the tree, with very little left on top!! 

However, that isn’t the end of the story, because a day or two later I was again out at the front of the house, taking the compost bin to the garden, when I heard tapping coming from the same mulberry tree.  Again instinct told me it was the wrong time of the year for a woodpecker to be at work, and anyway the tapping was rather too leisurely for any self respecting woodpecker!  Again, closer inspection bought the answer, as I said above there was very little left on top, but that which was there, either monsieur or madame le voisin (neighbour), I couldn’t see which because there was a stone outbuilding in the way, was using a very long stick to dislodge – they were obviously only going to clear up these leaves once!!  Well, as this picture shows they had very thickly carpeted the grass below, and you might spot the “lazy woodpecker” leaning against the tree if you look closely!!

Just occasionally we hear church bells

As many of you will know, we have just returned from a visit to England, a trip that started off as about 4 weeks and ended up as nearly six, as my Dad had to go into hospital for major surgery.  It was good we were able to be there for when he went in and for his return, remarkably just 4 days after what appears to have been a five hour + operation, returning to the ward at about 4 o’clock in the afternoon and wanting us to visit that evening.  He was well enough to have four visitors for an hour and a half, whilst we waited for the registrar to confirm that they had successfully done what they set out to do!!  When he was home and settled we were able to return home, to our sleepy part of rural Vendée.  Regular reports assure us he is making steady progress, but it will still be several weeks before he can start to drive again and already my Mum is having withdrawal symptoms, as she can’t go shopping everyday!!!

Although six weeks is a long time to be away, and the day after we returned our lovely French neighbours came over delighted to see us back, and worried that we had decided to stay in England!!!  We had got a message to them about our delayed return, but they were still pleased to see lights on in the house again, all the other houses in our little hamlet, of which only two are regularly inhabited, hide behind us, so they would have felt cut off again like they had been for the five years the house was empty before we moved in!!  But, looking back, we did manage to fit an awful lot into our visit this time, the first since our return after the New Year in January.

We started by driving from here to Norfolk, via Dieppe and Newhaven, for Linda to drop me off in Caister-on-Sea for my annual gathering of the ACV (Association of Countryside Volunteers), before she drove on to York to catch up with her family and meet the latest addition – Harley who had been born back in August, his Dad, Linda’s nephew, is a biker! After an enjoyable and successful gathering I got a lift up to York to join Linda and similarly catch up with everyone there.  We then went down to Daniel and Lisa’s in Stroud, as somewhere in the distant past, I had reputedly offered to help Daniel block pave his front garden to ease their parking problems!!  Arriving as it was getting dark in very heavy rain (about the only rain we saw all the trip!!) we found Daniel and his friend having a mud bath as they finished off taking off the turf and soil, which Daniel was having to carry in large plastic buckets through the house (hall, living room and kitchen) along a strategically placed path of black bin bags.  Amazingly when the bags were later removed, you could hardly tell he had muddily slipped and slid through the house numerous times.  The next few days were thankfully sunny and the quagmire drained quickly, and apart from meeting some good friends for lunch and our traditional Saturday morning coffee in Mill’s Cafe in Stroud, meeting whoever happens to be around, we managed to get the job (several thousand pavers) eighty percent finished in the time we had.  We also then spent some time in the annex at the back of our Stroud house “tidying up” and consolidating things after Victoria had moved her things out into her new house in Plymouth (more of that later), hired a van and managed to empty the storage unit we have been renting for the last 3 ½ years, into the annex.  The annex is now stacked high and we won’t be able to get anything easily out of it, but we will be over a hundred and eight pounds a month better off, and there was the possibility that this amount was about to have VAT added in addition, part of the austerity measures we are hearing so much about!!  However, not all good news as we got back to an unexpected UK tax bill, having been given duff information a year previously.  Having had a bit of a rant (managing to avoid mentioning Costa coffee et al!) at an incredibly patronising technical advisor, we’re now introducing our own austerity measures!!!!

That done and with a car full of things we had collected or found when sorting out the storage, we headed for my parents and then fairly quickly on to my cousin’s new house just outside Worcester for a family get together.  I had had the presence of mind to get my Dad to add me to his car insurance, which meant that we could all go in his car, rather that squash my Mum and Dad in with the log basket, beer making equipment, bread making machine, slow cooker etc.  As you may gather, we once again have the time to use those labour saving gadgets that at the time seemed such a good idea, but we were always too busy to remember.  The bread machine has already been put to good use on those day’s that the bread van (camion boulanger) doesn’t call, as well as using it successfully for the first time to make pizza dough – may become a regular for visitors next year!!  Booking has already opened and some slots are already taken!!!!  

A few days followed at my parents trying to make an inroad into the list of jobs my father had ready for us, as well as several others that then became obvious or at least came to mind!  As they say “no rest for the wicked” although not sure how that panned out with our luck in avoiding the rains in the Vendée and present devastating storms in the UK (“it never rains on the righteous!!”) as we returned to Stroud to do some more on the drive.  We were nearly able to get it finished before heading off to Plymouth, via Thatcham to pick up Tyler, to spend a few days with Victoria and Dermot. Here we would see their new house, meet some more of Dermot’s family and thoroughly warm up the house, very necessary as the weekend was the first cold snap of the year, which at the time had precious little heating, but it’s surprising what a good party and a few drinks can do.  Thankfully, the heating has now been installed and next stop a shower!!

The house that Victoria and Dermot have bought and already worked incredibly hard on, was a fantastic bargain, dint of being badly converted into two flats and generally, although sound and with new windows, neglected over a long period of time – where have I heard that before, a bit the case of “like father like daughter, we’ve both had extensive renovation projects recently, both likely to continue for some months to come!  The house is huge, with lovely big high rooms (kitchen, games room, lounge, dining room, three bedrooms, study, a bathroom and another on the way and a reasonably sound two storey lean to with plenty of potential) lots of potential as well as lots of stairs, currently a round trip from the kitchen in the basement, to the toilet on the top (3^rd) floor is over 70 steps!!  That and a plentiful supply of DIY and the gym won’t be necessary for a while!! Already it is looking great and their plans for the future are admirable.

Back then to the Forest of Dean and D-day regarding my Dad’s op, with a round trip to the hospital of over fifty miles, we spent quite a lot of time in the car and by the hospital bed and back to where we started at the top of the page.   

On our return, always a long journey and as the ferry was rather cold we didn’t get as much sleep as normal but fortunately we had been warned of the bloodshed in the kitchen.  Indeed, it had been cleared up before we got back by some kind friends down the road, who we had asked to pop in and get a letter that needed posting that we had left strategically, obviously thinking we might have been delayed.  Coming to get the letter they were quite literally greeted by blood all over the kitchen floor, liberally “watered” down with beetroot and blackberry juice.  The recent unprecedented rainfall, that we missed being in England but that seems to have now arrived in England since our return to France, I guess we must just be lucky, had cause a leak in the downstairs bedroom, which caused the electricity to trip and the freezers to no longer freeze!!

Since our return, we have been slowly getting back into the routine of DIY and gardening, with a pause as Beaujolais nouveau arrivée and karaoke beckoned, my rendition of Tom Jones’ Delilah being in danger of quite literally bringing the house down although there were a couple of  bravos as we beat a hasty retreat shortly afterwards!!  There have however been some difficulties getting out of bed in the morning, it’s the shutters and the dark mornings in France, you just don’t realise its morning, as some of our normally early rising visitors will attest to!!    We are also being very careful as the females in the three local English couples we have the most to do with have had a shattering time; broken wrist, seven broken ribs and a broken humerus, in that order.  But, as people keep telling us, at least that’s three, although ‘er with the ribs might disagree!!!

After all the hustle and bustle of the last few weeks, it was great to be back even though for a few days it was so dark and so quiet that it was difficult to sleep, something I used to find at my parents house, particularly before the village had street lights and the Severn Bridge (the first one!) was built, yes I’m old enough to remember both, and I hear you asking what’s the significance of the bridge; the rush hour starts earlier now the village is within commuting distance of Bristol and Bath!  It’s even been quiet during the day as it’s a relatively quiet period in the farming calendar and the other day, with the light breeze being in the right direction, I could even hear the church bells from the next village, some three kilometres over the hill, if the wind is too strong you can’t hear the bells for the trees!!!  That’s until the peace and quiet was shattered by our neighbours starting to re-roof their barn (is it a case of keeping up with the Joneses or simply a reflection of the recent storms, reputedly over 160 cm of rain fell in only a few days!) and our other neighbour who is both fairly deaf and heavy footed starting her car, I think her driving instructor told her to listen for the revs!!

Now, I must away and prepare for my next “gig” – photo enclosed and if that doesn’t do it, think Lady in Red with a gender change!!  And, still not there?  Tis the season to be merry – Ho, Ho, Ho!!!

 

 

You and you

But, it’s a bit more difficult than that in France, as I tried to explain recently to Jean-Luc the Chairman of the local Leisure Committee and Père Noël arranger who was sitting next to me at a celebration lunch recently, which although another story, went on until eleven o’clock at night!!!  

With lunch well under way after the customary kisses and handshakes on arrival.  Canapés and a couple of aperitifs later and we were sitting down beneath the gazebos under a reasonably sunny sky with the jugs of fruity rosé having been liberally replenished and the main course now finished.  As is usual in France this was followed by the cheese course and red wine was strategically placed along the table, again quite normal for the cheese course despite being regularly told that the trend is changing somewhat to chilled white wine – maybe for connoisseurs or simply a trend that hasn’t yet reached our part of deepest France!  Well, having passed the cheese down the table I started to pour the wine to those around me and turned to Jean-Luc and proffered the wine with a “pour vous” to make sure he wanted some, adding that as he lived just over the road he didn’t have to worry about driving home, although I was to discover later he did have to negotiate the highway with a heavily laden wheelbarrow, but you’ll have to read on to find out why!!!  Having accepted the wine, by sliding his glass along the table, he then rather confusingly said quite firmly and as I was in the process of pouring – “Non!”  Even the least linguistic of you will realise that the action meant yes, but with a verbal no!  Puzzled, and making a suitable facial expression, momentarily thrown and unable to verbalise “I’m sorry, but I’m confused!”  He added “pas vous, tu, que tu es mon ami” which in translation, as I said at the beginning is confusing, meaning “not you, you, as you are my friend!”  As Shakespeare might have said to vous or to tu, that is the question!!

I suppose, it’s all a bit like “to kiss or not to kiss,” a constant dilemma when going to any social function in France, with the added confusion of “how many!”  Let me elucidate, it is quite the norm to greet females and children by at the very least a peck on each cheek, although for good friends, family or Parisians (in that order), that might increase to three, four, five or even six!  Then there’s the men, who must all be greeted by a shake of the hand, however with very close family and friends a peck or two on the cheek isn’t unusual.  As reserved English folk, as you might imagine, something of a dilemma, so to be sure, I’ve come up with a formula – two kisses for woman and children unless they proffer a hand and physically push you away or simply in the case of children run off, or if they take the lead and go for three or more!!  Then, a handshake for all the men, with the possible addition of a hand on the shoulder, arm or elbow (women, children or men) if it seems necessary.  I did say it was confusing and imagine how long it takes for everyone to greet each other in a crowded room!!  Indeed, business meetings often have a fifteen minute lead in to make introductions and greet colleagues, prior to the official start time!  However, that doesn’t work with social events, where there is an added confusion of when to arrive!  A lunch invite for twelve o’clock seems to mean anything from 12.20 to 1.00 o’clock, as well to remember if you’re preparing the food, have it ready for 12.00 o’clock and it could be spoilt before it gets to the table – salads come in handy in the summer!!  Basically, it’s not just learning a new language, but also a whole new culture, which each time I learn more reminds me of that wonderful series of television adverts, for one of the high street banks (as it seems with all the best adverts, I remember the advert but not the company, a bit like remembering a joke without the punch line!!), where they stress the importance of knowing local knowledge or customs when doing business abroad; such as never finishing what food you have on your plate in China, as your host will think you are still hungry and bring more food, each time the plate is cleared!!  As I said, it’s confusing!!

Writing this reminds me of an incident a few months earlier and now I guess I’ve got two friends!!  I was working in the garden when the local fauchage man (local handyman / grass cutter / roadman / odd job man) employed by the local commune by the mayor and his council came to cut the communal areas in the hamlet.  As mentioned above it is customary in France to greet other men with the shake of the hand and a “Bonjour Monsieur,” a title always being polite, not simply “Bonjour.” So remembering my etiquette, I greeted him as described above, but whilst still shaking my hand firmly, he equally firmly said “Non!”  A similar puzzled expression to that above received a “Non Monsieur, Alain.”  So I guess it’s now alright to tu him, but as its first name terms maybe it should be ...... no let’s not go there, I’ll stick with my tried and tested formula, at least until I have sufficient French to get out of a sticky situation, should the need arise.

So, although somewhat confusing, I trust that should you regard yourself as a vous or a tu, your now know the appropriate etiquette, although a word of warning here, as we have discovered with most things French, the protocols and customs are often very different in different parts of France and as the French think the English are reserved, may well treat you differently anyway.  On my arrival, one of the ladies at the lunch proffered a hand which I sidestepped and she like the rest of them got a peck on each cheek instead.  Her response was something along the lines of “I didn’t think the English did things like that,” mind you by the end of lunch she had arranged to come around to my house for a cold shower, but that is quite definitely another story!!!

Oh, and the journey home with the wheelbarrow I mentioned earlier; Jean-Luc had agreed to bring a game of pallets for post-luncheon sport as well as a selection of board / card games.  The pallets, customarily played by the men but at which Linda excels and could well end up representing France or maybe England, should it become an Olympic sport, consists in a nutshell as I may have mentioned in an earlier blog, of two teams throwing fairly heavy 5 cm diameter metal discs (coloured or numbered to identify the different teams) onto a 30 cm square target made of 2 cm thick lead – hence the wheelbarrow!  A small disc is thrown first and then the team nearest to this at the end wins and scores as many points as it has discs nearest to the small one, may be one point or as many as six if the opposition aren’t very good or simply unlucky.  It is usually the first team to 12 points that wins.   

Une petite pause sur la terrasse

Quel est ce monde, si plein de soins,

Nous n'avons pas le temps de se lever et regarder. 

William Henry Davies ~ Leisure

What is this world, if full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare.

No apologies for using this quote once more, but it is just so apt and reminds me how lucky I am to have the time!  I’ve also translated it into French and it still scans quite well, now I just need to learn it sufficiently to retort to our neighbour the next time we are sitting outside having a very English Tea break and she passes with a somewhat surprised “Ah, une petite pause!” hence the title of this small piece.

At a recent petite pause, we were far from idle, as there was just so much birdlife to see, and at times to duck from; as the swallows, who in many ways stole the show, used the space between the buildings as a wall of death repeatedly flying round and round in close formation, as many as six at a time.  Then, one or more would peel off and either rollercoast down towards us and backwards and forwards between the house sometimes seeming to play chicken with us, who would duck or swerve first!, or they slalom in and out of any open door or window – barn, garage or indeed house – before a tighter wall of death sequence and back out into the general mêlée.  Who needs animals in a circus when you have nature’s own fantastic antics?  And, the swallows don’t stop there, as not only are they the aeronautical acrobats but they also do a mean high wire act (although when the young are just learning to fly it can be a little tentative, the less confident staying nearer the supports!), as well as clowning around just for the pure joy of chasing each other or laughing at the strange English couple sitting drinking their tea below.  They have also sent the odd “custard pie” our way, but it might be tempting fate to say they haven’t scored a direct hit – YET!!

But, it didn’t stop there, as in the time it took to drink the cuppa and force ourselves back to work we witnessed even more visually as well as audibly!  There was a blackbird and a little woodpecker who repeatedly flew, with a purpose, from the wooded bank behind the neighbour’s house to the garden of another neighbour and back.  They were obviously intent on something, which we later discovered was the rapidly ripening and equally rapidly disappearing cherries on the neighbour’s tree!

Distant mewings alerted us to a pair of huge buzzards soaring high above the hamlet on the warm currents rising from below, as mere specks high in the azure blue of the cloudless day, they were far too high to be hunting, even their keen eyesight wouldn’t have spotted a tasty field mouse from such a far-flung vantage point.  No, they were simply having fun and finding time to stop and stare, albeit aimlessly, well fed and happy on this warm sunny day.  With our own lunch looming fairly rapidly, we really ought to have dragged ourselves away from this remote display, but the languid mewings were cut into by the closed and louder sounds of the hoopoe – hoo poe, poe, poe, poeee .... and the nearly repetitious cuckooing of our neighbourhood thug, although our particular one has the tendency to add an occasional extra cuc – cuc koo, cuc koo, cuc koo, cuc cuc koo!!, in no obvious pattern, having the time not only to stand but also to listen, we spent some time trying to work out if the extra cuc was regular or erratic (OK, ‘er indoors is bound to pick up on that line and say that actually it was only me, not her!!)  Having just decided that the pattern was irregular, not to be outdone, and maybe trying to grab my attention, the hoopoe started to miss out the poe!!

Finally, there were the chickens noisily scatting around for any tasty morsel, behind the nearby barn, the cooing pigeons passing backwards and forwards further down the drive and the redstarts, who had successfully reared their brood in our open barn, bopping up and down with their squeaky warbling competing with the scolding chuckles and short twitters of the blue tits who had successfully nested in a small hole by our garage door. 

What with the pigeon piazza, the swallows multilayered spaghetti junction and the blackbird / woodpecker boulevard / motorway and all the various tweets and twitters, I’m tempted to say that thankfully there wasn’t a mobile phone in sight to shatter the peace, even though it wasn’t all that quiet.  And .... with so much going on there was a real danger that the petite pause would become somewhat grand!, and once we have our cour cache (hidden courtyard) très grand.  But, although this might stop our immediate neighbour from noticing us slacking, we will still, as during the recent weather, dine in the company of 1000’s of passersby, if the multitudes of vapour trails criss-crossing the sky are indicative of the evening rush hour.  Hopefully however, like the buzzards, they’ll be too high to really notice and certainly too far away for us to hear the unspoken tut-tuts or to see the nearly raised eyebrows as we have yet another petite pause.  But to that I’ll simply say -  Pas le temps de voir, en plein jour, Streams plein d'étoiles, comme un ciel de nuit. ~ No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night. A little more of that wonderful poem!